


There's no business like snow business

by Goose_Goddess



Category: Spider-Man - All Media Types
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-11
Updated: 2017-12-11
Packaged: 2019-02-13 12:50:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,489
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12984447
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Goose_Goddess/pseuds/Goose_Goddess
Summary: For this prompt:(Kind Of) Alone for the Holidays AUBecause they wanted to save money, Character A decided to stay on campus during the holiday break and work odd jobs to pay for their dorm. It seemed like a great idea at the time…until the power went out in the building and what few students remained became snowed in.http://auideas.tumblr.com/post/168370111277/aac-2k17-december-9th





	There's no business like snow business

There’s No Business like Snow Business

Peter collapsed onto the second-hand futon in his living room. He was exhausted. He’d taken two part-time jobs for the holidays while he was between semesters. It wasn’t like he had much else to do with his time, and he desperately needed the money. When Aunt May had died last summer, it had left him with a pile of bills and no family. Fortunately, he still had a scholarship that covered all of his tuition and books; he just had to cover room and board and keep paying down the medical bills the insurance hadn’t covered.

As a result, his tiny apartment and his diet of ramen and mac-and-cheese. Speaking of which, he was starving. His enhanced metabolism was a pain to keep up with. He wandered into the tiny kitchen and grabbed a jar of peanut butter and a spoon before collapsing back onto the couch. He had just put in eight hours at the local tech store dealing with demanding shoppers. He had three documents to proofread and he should really get some patrolling in. He took a spoonful of the peanut butter and ate it slowly, trying to decide what to do next. What he wanted to do was crawl into bed and sleep. But the increased number of shoppers on the streets meant that the smaller crimes were up and with the cold weather, the police presence was down. The cops tended to stay in their cars this time of year. He ate a few more spoons of the peanut butter, enough to stop his stomach from complaining. Then pulled on his Spider-Man costume. Knowing how cold it was outside, he pulled it on over the new liner suit he’d developed with Stark. It made the suit bearable when the temperatures got arctic. He did pull a knit cap on over his mask, but he’d learned his lesson about scarves—they provided too much of an opportunity for someone to grab and strangle.

Patrol was uneventful, stopping a few mugging and an attempted robbery in a small mom-and-pop store. But exhaustion was really getting him down, and the temperature sure wasn’t helping. He was pretty sure it had dropped ten degrees while he’d been out. He perched on the edge of a building and decided he needed to head home and sleep before he collapsed. 

“Hey, Baby Boy.” Deadpool’s voice came from behind him.

Peter grinned. Deadpool was always entertaining, and he frequently brought food. Of course, there was the whole issue of the massive crush he had on the Merc, but he wasn’t going to think about that now. “Hey, Pool. How’s the Merc business going. Haven’t seen you around much.”

“The team had a job for SHIELD. Just got back. Baddies all locked up, and everyone else home for the holidays. How 'bout you? Keeping busy?” Pool sat on the edge next to Peter and offered him a bag. “Tacos?”

“Thanks. Been really busy.” Peter took a taco and unwrapped it.

“Shouldn’t you be between semesters? Out partying like the rest of the college kids?” Deadpool took a bite out of another taco. While he didn’t know Peter’s name or where he lived, he did know he was a college student and had actually covered Peter’s patrol a few times when Peter had to study or finish a paper.

Peter shrugged. “Gotta work. No studying right now so I took an extra job.”

Deadpool nodded. “I know how that goes.”

The two sat for a while quietly eating. 

“Hey,” Peter said suddenly. “It’s snowing.”

Deadpool looked up. “It is. Amazing.”

Peter stood up. “Well, I have to get some sleep. If you’re back in town, I’ll see you again soon?”

“Course you will.” Deadpool agreed. “I’m always looking out for you.”

*****

The snow kept falling. And falling. And falling.

18 inches in less than 24 hours brought the city to a grinding halt, and it was still coming. Peter found himself at home with plenty of time to sleep because the Tech Store closed when a state of emergency was declared. Then the power went out in Peter’s building. 

Deciding that if he was going to be cold and in the dark, he might as well patrol. Peter pulled on his costume and headed out to patrol. Swinging around, there wasn’t much going on. The plows in the area weren’t enough to keep up with the snowing and blowing. They were concentrating on keeping access open to emergency vehicles. 

Standing on the top of a building, with snow nearly up to his knees, Peter looked around. He’d never seen the city so still. While the snow made everything look cleaner and brighter, it felt too much like a post-apocalyptic world without the scurrying crowds and honking horns.

“Spidey!” 

Peter turned to see a tall red form striding across the roof. “Hey, Pool. Why are you out in this?”

“Pah. This ain’t nothing. This is a typical weekend where I’m from. Takes more than this to slow us Canadians down.”

“Well, it certainly took out the bad guys.” Peter turned and looked out over the city. “Nothing going on.”

“Ah… Actually…” Deadpool said. Peter glanced at the Merc to see him scratching his head. “SHIELD called us. They said there’s something wrong with the weather here. They wanted my team to check it out. Problem is my team is having as much trouble getting around as the rest of the city.”

“What about the Avengers?” Peter asked. 

Deadpool shrugged. “Apparently they’re all out of town on some mission. Only one around is Legolas. He’s in, has Jarvis scanning for things to follow up on. I figured you wouldn’t be slowed down by snow since you don’t travel on the ground.”

Peter nodded. “Okay. I’m in.” He sighed. “Not like I have many other things to spend my time on. No power at home, and no baddies to take down. Might as well look for some weird weather anomaly.”

Deadpool clapped. “Awesome!” He handed Peter an earpiece. “Got my teleported and my grappling gun. Legolas says he’s got an address.”

Peter put the earpiece in and turned it on. “Spiderman here.” He said. 

“Hey, webhead.” Clint’s voice replied. “Deadpool found you. Great. Jarvis located an address that seems to be the epicenter of the storm.”

“Good afternoon sir,” Jarvis said. “The maps and thermal analysis have pinpointed the center of this storm.” 

“I’ll meet you there,” Clint said. 

Peter looked at Deadpool. “How 'bout I give you a ride? We’re going to be pretty obvious as it is, bright red against all that white. Add in the sound of your grappling gun, and a blind man would know we’re coming.”

“Murdoch would know we were coming even if we were silent,” Deadpool replied.

“Yeah, well that blind guy’s one of a kind. So ride?”

“Hell yeah. Spidyback ride” Deadpool replied.

The trip to the address was surreal. Everything was abnormally silent. The snow seemed to even muffle the noise from the buildings. And Deadpool, who could normally be counted on to talk constantly, was silent. 

They landed on the room of the building Jarvis had located. 

“Hey Meridia, we’re here. On the roof.” Deadpool said. 

“Yeah, I see you. On the taller building across the way. Looks like there’s movement on the top floor.” Clint replied. 

“Okay, then in we go,” Deadpool announced. He strode over to the door. “Great, it opens in. No shoveling needed.” He tried the knob, and the door opened easily. 

The two entered the room and made their way down the stairs slowly. They made it to the top floor and saw a dark, empty hall lined with closed doors. Deadpool pulled a gun out of his holster. Peter punched him in the shoulder. Deadpool looked at him, then leaned over and whispered in his ear. “Rubber bullets. I know your rules.”

Peter nodded, and followed him down the hall. Looking ahead, Peter noticed a glimmer of light under one door. He tapped Deadpool on the shoulder and pointed toward the door. Deadpool nodded, then headed for the door. He leaned in, pressing his ear against the door and listened. Then he turned and held up one finger to Peter. 

Peter nodded and stepped to the other side of the door. He murmured quietly so Clint could hear. “One guy. We’re going in.”

Deadpool looked at Peter, then nodded, holding the guy up and ramming the door with his shoulder.

A man in a floor-length fur coat swung round and glared at them. “Who are you.” He roared at them.

“Deadpool at your service,” Deadpool said, striding into the room, gun pointed at the man. “This here’s the friendly neighborhood Spider-Man. You’ve probably heard about us. Hint. He’s the good cop. I’m the nightmare.”

“Deadpool, please.” Peter glared at him, knowing it wouldn’t do any good. 

Deadpool laughed. “See what I mean. He even says Please. Now. The real question is, who are you.”

“I am Dr. Polar.” The man drew himself up and glared at the two men. 

“Dr. Polar? And you’re going with a bear motif?” Deadpool waved at his fur coat. “But shouldn’t you have picked white fur? And Baby Boy, your ridiculous animal-themed villains is really sad. You need to up your game if you want to be taken seriously by the other supes.”

“Hey! I don’t make these guys, I just put them away.” Peter protested. He let Deadpool keep the man distracted while he scanned the room. A computer was running in the corner, and he wanted a closer look at it.

He glanced at Deadpool and tilted his head toward the corner. Deadpool nodded back, and then focused back on the man in fur. Alternately insulting and asking annoying questions, and periodically prompting a response from Peter, he kept the man’s attention on himself.

Peter slid over to the computer and looked closely at what was running. Following the cables, he noticed several ran through a hole in the wall into the next room. He pressed an ear to the wall and could hear the steady hum of machinery coming through the wall.

Peter looked more closely at the software running on the monitor. Unfortunately, it didn’t have any obvious Off or Stop button. Nor was is clear what it did.

He turned his attention over to Deadpool and the man. The man was currently complaining about how much money was being spent on global warming, and not enough being spent on his area of research. It wasn’t clear exactly what that was…the man kept rambling and yelling about how he was going to show everyone that global warming was ridiculous.

“So how are you going to do that?” Deadpool asked. “Become a Polar Bear villain? Chase New Yorkers down the street? Cause gotta tell you, Moose is more terrifying if you’re looking for a cold weather animal. Or Wolverines. They’re vicious. Oh, wait. That’s right. Logan already claimed that one. But seriously, ever seen a Moose charging? Terrifying.”

The man stopped ranting and stared at Deadpool in confusion. “Moose? What Moose? No. I’m not a villain. I’m a scientist.”

Deadpool snorted. “The two aren’t mutually exclusive.”

“I’m just proving that their thesis is incorrect. Global Warming is not actually real.”

“And you’re doing this how?” Deadpool prodded.

“I built a machine that proves that global warming isn’t real.”

“By making a blizzard? Dude. You can’t disprove global warming by creating a freak storm.” Deadpool laughed. “That doesn’t prove anything.”

“Jarvis,” Peter whispered. “I think this is the control, but I don’t have much time to figure out what’s going on. I think the best way to stop it is just turn everything off. Can you cut off all power to this building? We can have Stark look at it later.”

“On it, sir.” 

Peter turned back to the pair across the room, now yelling at each other about penguins. Then the light in the room went out, and the hum from next door stopped.

“No!” The man screamed and turned towards his computer. Peter quickly webbed him up. Deadpool put his gun away and put his hands on his hips. “Well, should bring you along for all my jobs.” Deadpool laughed. “Baby Boy, any time you’re involved the bad guys are always so amusing.”

Peter sighed. “Yeah. It does seem that way. We need to check what he’s got in the next room. Then turn it over to Stark.”

“Stark?” Deadpool asked.

“Yeah, I’m not sure I’m comfortable giving whatever this is to SHIELD. They may get it anyhow, but I trust Stark more with something like this.”

“Gotta say I agree with you.” Clint walked in through the door. “He might use it to make a skating rink in the Sahara, though.”

Peter nodded. “I can live with that. Controlling and selling weather, not too sure I’m up for that.”

Deadpool looked between the two. “Actually, it might be best if this all just disappeared. I’m not too sure I like the idea of anyone selling weather. And while I think the whole world should have the opportunity to enjoy the wonder that is hockey, I think the desert doesn’t really need an ice rink.”

“But what if it can be used to bring water where it’s needed? Stop starvation?” Peter asked.

“I dunno Baby Boy,” Deadpool said. “What is it you always say? With great power comes great responsibility? Maybe if a real good guy like you were in charge, it’d be okay. But with politicians in charge? No, I think it’s not worth the risk.”

Clint nodded. “I think he’s right.” 

“There ya go webhead. Two against one. You take the baddie out of here and leave the rest to us.”

“But…” Peter protested.

Deadpool shook his head. “Nope. Get him out of here, so he doesn’t get hurt. Turn him in and head home.”

Peter sighed. He had to admit the two, although too cynical, were probably right. Then he turned back to Deadpool and held out his hand. “Phone.”

Deadpool looked at him. “PHone? You don’t want the cops coming here.”

Peter shook his head. “No. Phone.”

Deadpool shrugged and pulled a phone out of one of his pockets and threw it to him. Peter typed in his number and labeled it Spidey. Then tossed it back. “Text me when you’re done. We can get tacos.”

Deadpool stood looking back and forth between the phone and Peter. “You… you gave me your number.” 

Clint stared at Peter. “I don’t think even Stark has your number.”

Peter shrugged. “Jarvis knows how to reach me.” He grabbed the fur wrapped man and swung them out of the building and towards the nearest police station. The snow had stopped, and the sun was showing from behind clouds that were rapidly breaking up. He grinned. Maybe the holidays weren’t going to be so bad.


End file.
